Just a Touch of Madness...

Oh how I love watching the confused expressions that flash across people's faces when I attempt explaining my life.  I am not saying this with the slightest of sarcasm.  I truly do enjoy seeing the conflicting emotions that are a result of trying to comprehend my activities... or more accurately - one activity in particular.

Most of my daily routines are accepted as sufficiently mundane:

~ My primary job is as a commercial truck driver which requires my residing at work five days per week (70 hours on the clock, 60 hours of driving).

~ I am an avid reader that enjoys all genres, though I've been known to favor literature possessing elements of history, psychology, and dystopian societies.  Having a career that primarily places me behind the wheel, I have taken to acquiring numerous audiobooks... preferably unabridged.

~ I am a chronic consumer of music.  Again, genre does not matter.  Those who have had the misfortune of traveling any distance with me can attest to my varied listening habits as I transition from classical to heavy metal, bluegrass to modern pop.

~ I spend much of my spare time studying.  The topics are yet again greatly varied.  Politics, history, psychology, social dynamics, technological developments (ancient and current), science, medicine, art, fashion, and civil rights are but a few of my common pursuits.

~ Most unsurprising, I am a lover of food and coffee.  I'll eat most anything, but I expect my coffee to be thick and dark.

I know, you might be thinking, "These things seem normal enough.  You have many interests.  Nothing wrong with that." Truly, nothing I've listed thus far contributes to people's concerns.  In fact, my varied pursuits have led others to seek my advise.  Some friends and colleagues to start calling me Jeeves.

The confusion starts when the topic of my favorite pastime is addressed: Writing. 

Now, writing itself is not a subject of concern.  Many people write for many different reasons.  Be it the expression of opinion, the sharing of skill or knowledge, a telling of personal memories, or a product of pure imagination aimed solely at entertaining - authors have been putting thought to print for eons.  Personal diaries, blogs, poetry, lyrics, textbooks, epic novels -  the world has had more writers than there have been published authors.

By being a writer, I am not special.  The act of writing isn't what others find strange.  When people discover that I spend so much time writing, they tend to be curious.  Curiosity leads to conflict.

The following conversation was with a prospective writing friend... a conversation that seems to take a recurring path:

What do you write?
Mainly science fiction and fantasy.
Can I read something you've written?
Sure. (offer a piece fitting to reader's interests)
Where do get your story ideas?
I base my stories on reality.  Historic events, current news, and such.  Just need to shape the tale to fit the desired world.  You can take something as common as war and apply it to any era simply by expressing the appropriate technology and motivational drives.  Medieval conflict could be the desire to conquer new lands and gain resources - battle involves swords, archers, and siege machines;  likewise, a futuristic battle might involve the ambition to control a new planet for the same gained resources - the fight is waged with spaceships, lasers, and robotic warriors.
Are the characters based on real people, also?
Not in particular.  I don't make characters that are fictionalized versions of people I've met.  My characters are creations of my imagination.
How do you come up with so many personalities and manage to maintain a convincing dialog?
I spend about twelve hours each day talking to myself.
You talk to yourself?  Like speaking your thoughts out loud?
Like carrying the whole conversation for all the personalities.  I voice each person individually.
But, all people are different.  You can speak for two characters, but they would both still be you.
Unless you commit to the separate personalities completely.
Yes, but it is still you.  You can't accurately predict how characters would realistically react to each other.
And that is why I live my characters.  Speak as they speak, think as they think, feel as they feel... in real world situations.
You pretend to be a fictional character with real people?
No.  I am the character.  The people in my stories are real.  I make them real.  I give them flesh and I sit back watching what happens to my characters in the real world.
*a long pause* Uh... that's a bit crazy.  I've gotta go.  Nice talking with you.

Crazy.  Insane.  Mad.  Unbalanced.  Delusional.  Detached from reality.  Needing of professional help.  I've heard it all.  Perhaps they're right.  On the other hand, I find myself asking the question:

"Who hasn't lived the role of a fictional character?"

Before you claim innocence, I would like to offer examples:

When you visit your parents or grandmother, do you speak and act the same as you would during a night out with friends?

Do you talk to your boss in the same way as you do with a telemarketer calling during dinner?

Are you the same person whether sitting in church or sitting in bumper-to-bumper traffic?

Chances are, you have adapted individual personalities to address varying situations.  I know personally, I can be quite crude and profane on a regular basis... yet I manage to maintain a level of decency when dealing with others who possess more delicate sensibilities.

The ability to embody such a wide range of personas is what makes the human mind so remarkable.  The adaptation of who we are is key to our survival and success.  Our pliable minds are what separates us from animals.  A wolf can't decide to be a lamb, but you can be anything you wish.

In closing, I wish to offer a challenge.  A challenge without set rules.  A challenge without winners or losers.  The challenge is simple:

Sit down and talk to yourself.  Have a conversation between the party goer and grandma's favorite.  Have a debate between the optimist and pessimist.  And if you have an interesting discussion with yourself, consider writing it down and giving your characters names.

Reunion

High School Reunion.  Yes, reunion.  This is a topic that has started to appear more frequently as my graduation class' twentieth anniversary approaches.  It really seems like an odd concept.  Why would anyone want to gather the remnants of a group that was formed by force?  We didn't ask to be classmates.

We attended school because the law demands it.  The school we attended was determined by our parent's choice of community.  By circumstances, we were interned in a system that offered us no control.  Our classmates were fellow inmates.

We did our best to follow the rules... most of the time.  We did our best to understand the contradictory values being taught:  Work together as a community while striving to be better than your peers.  Conform yet excel.

Alliances were made based on shared interests or skills.  Some chose to be loners.  Many were complacent and embraced the passing of time.  Others struggled to face each day... feared they would never break free.

We managed to complete our sentences.  When the day came to declare our accomplishment, we stood as one and departed as individuals.  No longer bound together, we were free to make our own choices for the road ahead.

Many left the community to return with greater knowledge.  Some stayed.  Some departed and never looked back.  "Life Happened", one might say. 

Each person chose a path.  Some paths were short with great wonders.  Some paths were long and hard, continuing still.  A few paths revealed to be nothing but circles.  Still, we walked our path... took our journey.

Along the way, each person gained experience.  New skills.  New insights.  New understanding.  There was joy and pain... Success and failure.  Mostly, there was growth.

When a reunion was suggested, I thought about my former classmates and honestly cannot say I knew any of them.  Familiar faces, familiar names... but little more than acquaintances.  I realized I had spent years coexisting with strangers.  If I knew so few, how many knew me?

A reunion isn't about reconnecting with old classmates.  A reunion shouldn't be a competition of who gained weight or who was more successful.  A reunion is an opportunity to meet the men and women that grew from a bunch of clueless children.  We survived school and we are surviving life. 

We have grown as people and everyone has something worth sharing.  Personally, I look forward to meeting my former schoolmates... to truly meet them for the first time.

~ Don C Wilkes III

NaNoWriMo vs Driving Career

DO NOT TEXT AND DRIVE.

Simple rule everyone should be following.  Texting isn't limited to sending messages either.  Creating text-based messages of any sort while in operation of a motor vehicle is dangerous.  Facebook, Twitter, blogs, Instagram, searching digital maps or reading anything on any device must be avoided.

Avoided?  No.  Not just avoided - prohibited.  Staying connected through a phone is tempting.  We must all be committed to be safe and leave the phone alone.

That being said... I find myself being tempted more than ever this month.

I have been trying to participate in this year's NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month).  Simply put: writers from around the world attempt to rough draft a 50,000+ word novel in 30 days.  So far, I've managed to write 29,262 words.  Reaching 50k shouldn't be a problem, yet it does present an interesting observation in the area of writing process.

What can you expect to achieve in 30 days?  Is 50,000 words realistic?  Is it worth the effort?

Well, let's start with some simple math.  The goal of 50,000 words in one month equals 1,667/day.  Now, you take a someone who is slow at typing like myself (25/words per minute average) and that works out to just over 1hr of writing time each day.  Surely, anyone can find a single hour in which they can dedicate to writing.

Thus, time isn't an issue... if you have something to write about.

If it was a simple matter of typing an hour each day, this challenge wouldn't be hard at all.  Of course, it isn't so simple when we want to have something worth reading in the end.

I am in day 9 of this challenge and have spent just over 20 hours of actual typing to achieve 29,000 words.  What I have created so far is a good beginning to a story that establishes a few key characters and sets a foundation for the story's world.

Honestly, it needs a lot of work.  Spelling, grammar, plot transitions and overall flow will require major rewrites before out can be considered a novel.  Right now, it is a notion - an idea requiring nurturing.

When I reach the end of this month, I will have 50,000+ words that hint at something more.  As it should be.

A draft isn't supposed to be pretty.  True, there are writer's who will turn out a beautiful tale on the first try.  This is rare and never consistent.  When you first write a story, you must ignore perfection and just focus on putting the tale in writing.  If you spend all your time worrying about the details, the story will never get written.

Just write.  You will have plenty of time to edit and mold the story.  In fact, you may find that much of your story needs reworked in the end.  As your story grows, so do you.  You will find new ideas to add earlier in your tale or realize that other ideas must be removed.  This is normal.  Let the tale evolve and watch yourself grow through the process.

Now, I am going to trying writing another chapter in my story without stressing about my horrid grammar.  Happy Creating!

The Walker Legacy: Threnody of Dreams

Excerpt from book one of the Walker Legacy: Threnody of Dreams by Don C Wilkes III:

I often find myself remembering the tales of my youth.  Stories filled with dreadful villains and valiant heroes fighting ever onward towards an honorable goal.  Though others may recall such tales shared by their elders, I fear my tales were of a different origin.  The stories I remember lacked witches and magic and mythical beasts.

Instead, the stories told to me were of simple people like you and me.  Boys and girls working hard to better themselves... one day becoming men and women who would usher in a better world.  You can become anything your heart desires, the stories said.  Dream.  Strive.  Grow.  The world is changing, things are getting better and the future is bright.

So I sat.  I waited.  I watched.

As the years progressed, I started to realize the myth behind those tales.  Opportunities suggested by the stories were few.  Hard work was rarely enough to grant a better life.  For most people, only two options existed:  exchange every waking hour of your life for very little or do very little for the same amount of gain.

I chose work.  Sometimes I question why.  I guess I was holding to the belief that it actually mattered.  A job that demanded weeks - even months - away from my family seemed reasonable to keep my family fed and secure.  Of course... the world was changing, things would get better and the future was bright.

Still I sat.  I waited.  I watched.

I felt such failure as hard work fostered my isolation.  The years spent in a futile attempt to better my home only resulted in the alienation of those I love.  I found I was laboring for the benefit of strangers.

The blame is my own.  I accept the product of my deeds.  At first I had believed that everyone had changed in my absence and I felt betrayed.  Honestly, it was I who changed.  I was the traitor.  I thought I could force the tales to become a reality.  Hard work did little to secure my livelihood.  Ah, but the world is going to change, things must get better and the future surely is bright.

I'll just sit.  I'll wait.  I'll watch.

I dwell in a home that lacks in space or privacy.  Only thin walls separate my dungeon from the meager dwellings of other families.  At night, I can hear the shouts and cries from the strangers sharing my building.

At times I wish they were the sounds of violence.  So simple it would be to call for help.  Violence would identify a victim needing aid and a villain needing punishment.  Unfortunately, the cries are of desperation.  Lack of food.  Insufficient medicine.  Fear of being cast out into the night with no means of shelter from the elements.

My heart aches to offer aid but I have nothing to give.  My body begs for food while my mind insists that I must wait.  I ignore the body's ailments... for I must choose between eating and being healthy.  I would help others... but I can't even manage to help myself.  In the morning, I will leave for work and pretend everything is fine.  Besides, the world will change, things will get better and the future is bright.

I sit.  I wait.  I watch.

Gunshots rang through the night near my home and I failed to fret.  I calmly walked towards the flashing lights.  I could see the truth from far away.  Too many lights.  Too many officials.  Someone was dead.  I felt no surprise.  No regret.  It wasn't me lying on the ground.  It was just a stranger who I assumed was deserving of death.

Oh, how wrong I had been.  A stranger, yes, as I had never met the man.  Still, he was a brother.  Strewn upon the ground where the man died was nothing but scattered bits of food.  Bread.  Meat.  Milk.  The man had stolen food without the use of a weapon... he died trying to eat.

No longer is crime an act of the greedy.  People have taken to the role of villainy in desperation.  Has our society truly gotten to the point where larceny is a survival skill?  The world has changed, but things aren't getting better and the future seemed bright.

Sit.  Wait.  Watch.

I see the masses and cringe at the blind complacency.  The rich become ever richer.  The poor and weak are ignored.  The productive are either pressed into poverty or struggle to maintain the illusion of mediocrity.  The stories had told of the poor achieving success through determination and virtue.  The stories were wrong.

I see the able-bodied bulk of society sagging under the everpresent burden to fortify a gluttonous nobility.  The strain is too great!  People have started to break.  Many have fallen to their darker urges and taken to striking against their fellows believing there is nothing to gain from fighting the powers that be.

I am not immune to these effects.  I feel myself cracking.  I lash out at those around me in frustration.  I regret my actions.  I apologize though I know it will happen again.  I will break eventually.  Beneath this veneer of insight and reason lies something stronger.  Who I am will crumble away leaving something new.

I fear the inevitable change.  Some claim I will become a hero.  Worse, some expect a prophet.  I am no prophet.  I am barely a man.  None have spoken of what I expect to emerge.  A beast.  A demon.  A monster.  It really doesn't matter, I guess.  I'll become what I must.  The world must change, things have to get better and the future is now.

I stand.  I act.  I watch no more.

Oops! Let's blame it on a time rift...

Oh... I am so sorry!  I was sitting here thinking about everything I need to finish and the pile of tasks that must be started... when I noticed it had been nine months since my last blog!  O.o  What happened?!  I had a notebook full of future entries - some completed, many drafts - yet they never made it beyond paper.

Simple truth:  I forgot.  Yes.  I admit it.  I forgot that my last blog was in May 2013 and I was supposed to keep adding new material.  I was distracted by other things... some may have been shiny.  (Note: this is why I don't have pets.  Not that any animals have been harmed through my neglect, but I preemptively avoid the ill fated situation entirely.)

I know, some may ask "But Don... doesn't the Blogger page send you reminders?"  Well... yes, it did.  I had gotten a new phone, though.  I installed all my old apps (including Blogger and Gmail).  I just sort of, kinda, actually forgot to log into the apps.  I have nine months of unread email, also.  Probably should add that to my to-do list...

The irony is that I had intended to blog about Time Management last June.  Of course, I would be risking a moment of hypocrisy if I followed the planned route..... or is it salvageable?

Thing is, I was managing my time quite efficiently for the past nine months... in regards to writing.  As my schedule involves seventy hours of driving each week and a troublesome need of sleep, I have been trying to squeeze out every possible minute of available writing time I could find.  (Forgetting my blog will now be shoved into the 'Task Organization' blog - due to arrive within the next 7-270 days.)

~Time Management: the day is only so long.~

Believe me, I feel your pain.  Everyone has to deal with an endless demand on their time.  Work.  Study.  Cook.  Eat.  Clean.  Kids.  Friends.  Family.  Pets.  Bills.  Sleep.  Work, again!  Every day is filled beyond capacity and tomorrow will surely be worse.  Finding time to create is often pushed aside as being trivial. 
The question:  Is your creativity trivial?

If you answered Yes, then why do you worry about finding time?  Because it matters.  Creating - be it art, writing, music - isn't about fame or acceptance or recognition.  Creativity is part of your being begging to be realized.  Your creations are outward expressions of inward thoughts, desires, fears and dreams.  Sometimes an idea becomes so important that you must see it, feel it or hear it in order to find peace.

But who has the time?  We can't all just sit at home and dedicate our entire existence in pursuit of creativity.  We have responsibilities.  Instead, let me list a few tips that I have found especially useful:

- Run the marathon one-block-at-a-time:  you may feel like you aren't accomplishing your goal fast enough.  This can be frustrating, I know.  You can imagine the finished product, but it is so far away!  If writing, it is all too easy to look down at the word count and think "Is that all I've done?!  I'll never finish at this rate."   DON'T QUIT NOW!  Rarely is anything great created overnight.  A single hour here and there will soon add up.  The goal is wonderful, but don't give up because the journey seems endless.

- Fight the urge for progressive perfection:  this can be very hard to do.  I have found myself proofreading my work while trying to move forward.  This tactic doesn't end well.  My spelling is horrendous and my grammar would shock a preschooler.  The best thing you can do is continue to move forward.  Once you have finished, then you can examine your work and make adjustments.  It is much easier to correct a draft than trying to knock out a clean, finished product in a single go.

- Waste not, want not:  throw nothing away.  You may find yourself with ideas that are ill-suited for your current project.  Save those ideas!  They will come in handy later on - either in your current piece or future works.

- Friend or enemy: a major time consumer is the desire to create something that others will like.  It is easy to get lost in thoughts pertaining to future spectators.  You can't please everyone, nor should you try.  In fact, I suggest you forget about pleasing anyone.  There will always be someone who 'knows a better way'.  If they have a better idea, ask them to create it so you can see.  Lovers of creative materials are very notional.  Create for yourself.  Should you decide to share your gift with others, they will either love it or hate it.  Nothing you do will change this.  So long as you are happy, then you have crafted a masterpiece.

Well my friends, it is time for me to sleep.  A long night of work approaches too quickly.  As always: comments, suggestions, complaints, or random thoughts are always welcome.

Special note:  I have placed a reminder in four different devices as well as on the paper calendar to remind to post.  Feel free to throw hard objects in my general direction... should I forget.

'Til Paths Meet Again...

A Whole New World...

Whether we are painting a picture or writing a tale, we must always consider the World.  When I say "World", I mean the whole World - land and sea; climate and atmosphere; plant and animal; past, present and future.  Everything.  We tend to take much of our world for granted. 

 

No... this isn't leading to a rant of how we need to become one with the environment and kiss a few trees;  though, I know many of us would benefit from a day "outdoors".

 

I would like to talk about the World that exists within our creations.  Where does your character live?  What is the weather like?  How does society function?  Is it modern?  Ancient?  Alien?  If we were to visit your World - would we be considered gods or demons or even simpletons?

 

Much of a story's foundation can be found in the created World.  In fact, the World could be considered a character within itself.  You will obviously hold to facts and avoid creative license if you are writing a strict, facts-only, non-fiction tale.  Biographies, historical accounts and specific events exist in the real, "concrete" world.  Ah... but fiction is in a whole different ballgame.

 

Oh, sure.  You can create a story in the World you know from everyday experience.  Writers do this all the time.  Look at authors like Stephen King, Dean Koontz, or Laurell K Hamilton.  Real states.  Real towns.  References to local establishments and landmarks.  Even details to the societal structures, mannerisms, and language quirks.  The World of the stories are replicas of our real world... but there's a twist.

 

A fiction author has the freedom to add, augment, and even warp the real world.  Vampires, werewolves, psychos, aliens and supernatural powers are common tools.  Influences greater than anything we would ever encounter are added to our normal little world.  Disasters and trials to test the human race. Why?

 

Simple:  To explore the human condition.  Stephen King was shown time and again how people may react to extreme conditions.  The World was quite normal in King's tales until he adds a simple conflict - a crazy dog, a bullied girl, a possessed car, a plague, etc.  Suddenly the World evolves.  People react differently - the rules have changed.  The story can go as far as the author wishes. 

 

Most writers are smart enough to stretch the World without "breaking" it.  Readers can accept some pretty wild concepts, but they have to make sense.  Some examples of "stretching" your World and what is needed to avoid breaking it:

 

~Magic~

First, we must ask "What is Magic?"  Often we think of Magic as chants and spells and potions.  Witches, wizards, sorcerers and mages.  For your story, this may be true and that is just fine.  Truth is, Magic can be whatever your want it to be so long as there is a system of explanation. 

 

Your readers don't need exact details (though some will ask), but they need some basis of reality.  Where does the Magic come from?  Is it used by many or few? What are the Magic's  limits?  How does a person gain Magic?  How to lose it?  Most important, is it really Magic or a misconception?

 

My friend, Ryan Carver, is a self-proclaimed "Hobbyist Illusionist".  He spends much of his time studying the Art of Magic Tricks.  When I asked him what he thought of real Magic, he said:

 

"Magic is simply an art of demonstrating the impossible.  Well... impossible for those who are watching you.  Can you imagine how amazed the people of the 14th century would have been if we could show them something as simple as a cigarette lighter?  Ha!  They'd probably use the same lighter burn us at the stake!"

 

~Superpowers~

Superpowers are great!  Everyone has dreamed at some point of being a superhero.  Being able to fly or shoot fire or become invisible... oh, so many powers to choose from.  You will want to make sure you create an explanation as to why people have powers.  Mutants?  Science?  Alien?

 

When using powers you must include an anti-power - a weakness.  If your character is immortal, invincible, strong, fast, can fly and is happy... your readers won't believe it.  Stan Lee is known worldwide for his Superheroes.  The Heroes aren't remembered for their powers;  instead, they are remembered for their normalness.  We can relate to a Hero who has personal issues.  Sad as it is, happy and content characters are unbelievable.

 

~Aliens & Non-Humans~

Biggest mistake a writer can make is creating an Alien without considering its origin.  You should consider the Alien's World.  Climate, gravity, plant life.  How long is a day?  What sort of government exists there?  Was is a peaceful society?  Would we exploit them?  Was it a militant world?  Are the visiting Aliens invaders or refugees?

 

What makes them different from us... or more importantly, you must consider what makes the Aliens similar to Humans.  Gene Roddenberry demonstrated the effectiveness of Humanizing the Aliens not only in Star Trek, but also Andromeda and Earth: Final Conflict.  There might be some differences of appearance and surely different customs, but what makes them like Humans?  Do they fall in love?  Do they care for others?  Do the mourn the dead?  Do they feel jealousy, hatred, greed, lust, sadness, joy, contentment?  As always... what are their weaknesses?

 

---

 

There are many different places I could go from here, so I'll stop and continue in a future installment. 

 

Happy Creating!

'Til Paths Meet Again...

Technical Difficulties

Ouch!  Now that was a painful span of time between blog entries.  I couldn't log into any of my usual accounts and had to spend the last few months trying to convince web technicians that I am indeed ME!  Such a royal pain in the... *deep breath*

Ah... so this would be a fine time to discuss the tools of the trade.  (Might as well turn these lemons into potpourri.)

The most common means of writing these days is through the computer.  It is wonderful!  We can adjust the format to fit an intended feel.  The software will correct our spelling.  With the internet, you have an endless source of information references at your fingertips. Pick and choose fonts, insert pictures and even create an e-book to be easily sent to friends, family... even some publishers.

Fact is, I love writing on the computer.  The computer makes life so simple during the fabrication process.  I say "fabrication" because the computer does just that:  it facilitates the creation of a final product.  What the computer won't do is write the story for you.

The story you tell comes from within yourself and often you may find ideas, plots or character developments emerging at times that using the computer is impossible.  (Example:  I drive a semi-truck an average of 10hrs per day.  That's 10hrs of staring the road, listening to the radio and entertaining my own thoughts.  I can't very well pull over every time I have a good idea and yet I know I won't remember everything come the end of the day.). So, let's talk about tools that can help your writing no matter your situation:

1).  Pens & Pocket Notepads - never be without one!  Or several, even.  You could be on break at work, walking through a mall or having a really inspirational moment in the restroom when an idea hits.  Don't Lose That Idea!  Write it down!  You might decide later that it wasn't so great, but it might also be the shining gem that defines your story.  Even the ideas that don't work for your current tale are useful.  Keep them - for those ideas may be of use in future writings.

2).  Voice Recorder - hands-free note taking.  You could be driving or out for a jog when inspiration attacks.  Being able to record a message to be written down later can save a lot of frustration.  Now, don't run out and buy some fancy recorder.  No need to spend money on something you already have.  Chances are that many of you are reading this from a smart phone.  Go to your App Store.  You will find several free recording applications that work perfectly.  Remember:  you are recording story ideas... not dictating the closing argument for a murder trial.  It doesn't have to me perfect.

3).  Camera - take the inspiration with you.  Perhaps it's a sunset or a rusty old car or a flower growing through a sidewalk that sparked an idea.  Take a picture.  Take a few pictures.  Again, your phone is your friend.  It's true when they say a picture can speak a thousand words.  Problem is:  you probably don't have time to stand there and write those words.  Snap a picture, take it with you and write about it in the comfort of your own home.

These are three simple tools that can help you to collect writing ideas.  They can also help you to bring story issues with you.  When sitting at your computer writing, you may find you have hit a wall in the story.  You know where you want the story to go but can't find a good way to get there.  Grab your notepad and make a note - this is the issue, this is what must be achieved and this is the page where the problem sits.  Now move on.

Continue your writing at the point you wanted to reach.  Your notepad won't forget where your problem was and it might remind you at a later date.  You may also find that the problem is solved through further writing and that precious notepad will tell you where to go and fill in the gap.

In closing, I just want to say:  Every idea is golden.  No matter how epic or minor - no matter if it is currently relevant or goes unused - save every creative thought.  Those ideas are part of you and may prove to be the heart of your tale.